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Albus Dumbledore has a bunch going on until, well, you know. But, before that, he used a neato thing called a pensieve.

Me and Albus, we tight, and we the same in that we have a bunch going on in the noodle at all times. ALL times. All TIMES. Feeling me on this one? And with all the crap that rolls around in my head, I can say what has helped me keep this head together is my journal.

I started when I was 15 years old, and a photographer that came and spoke to my El Paso High School English class said she always carried two things in her bag besides the normal pursy type stuff. Camera, and Journal. Duly noted. So, since I’ve been 15, I’ve been writing, glueing, markering and documenting whats in my head. Almost daily some years, only in times of complete fucking crisis in others. I’d say today it’s almost every other day. And today my perfect journal looks like this on the outside.

The quote says “life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the number of moments that take our breath away.” -anon Any other somewhat daily writers out there? How often are ya writing? tell me whats up in the comments. XO, Rowan

Oh tarot, you know I love you. It probably loves me back.

I’ve been reading cards for about twenty years, most of those years professionally. Two choices: I can read for you, either in person or online. Use the “Book Now”/get read by Rowan link to make it happen. Choice 2) I can teach you how to read your own self. The Friday Night Witches and Bitches club meets at Texas Art Asylum right here in Houston, its an ongoing start-where-you-are type of class. That rules.

There is wine, shit talking, self expression, lots of learning. It’s AWESOME. 3rd option (it’s not finished yet, so thats why I didn’t mention it before)  a self study online course for Tarot Creatives. I’ll get that to ya next Halloween, 2014! So let’s get to reading!

Here is the deal. I’ve been working it like no other in the financial therapy dept, and this so far has pretty much sucked. SUUUUUUCKED. I’m moody, I’m not leaving the house much except to do fabulous work, to walk the dogs and occasionally hoop.

I’m looking at the past, and creating a new future. Fan fucking tastic. Cue up breakthrough number 83 ~ I realized I have a pretty rough relationship with money, and I want to have a smooth sailing, I feel you, this is a team, empathy relationship with money. Muy differente. And this is not my first rodeo, people. Ran with the scissors of Dave Ramsey, read books by Lynne Twist, learned about the Soul Of Money, and been on the floor of the SuperDome one year after Katrina, listening to Suze Orman tell the NOLA ladies that they had paved their own way to Hell by giving away their resources, and that she would teach them how to never, ever be there again. Thats a pretty big swing, right? Scissors to soul softness to the cold floor of the Superdome (that, by the way, a year after Katrina still vibed up despair.) Oh money, who are you? I thought about that, and I thought about dating money, go for a walk, a dinner, a dance, what would money look like? Cause I’m clear that I’m creating a face for money, much like folks create a face for divine source (God, Pan, Athena, HP, whatever.) So what would money look like, whose face is staring back at me over the candlelight? Know who I really wanted it to be? She’s so fly, I could wear her t~shirts, listen to her music, be DOWNNNNNNNNNNN.

No such luck. There I was, laying all angsty across my bed, hoping for Ani, when a sense of peace filled me, and the face of a man I’d admired for a long time floated into my mind. Someone who had changed my life for the better. Many times. Steve. Steve put a computer in my pocket, strengthened my bizness, gave me professional leverage and made me not AFRAID of computers. Creative genius that allowed me to be a creative genius. Steve also represents to me an authenticity with money, that you can make mistakes, be a jerk, get thrown out of your own company, learn from it, have vision, wear what you want, and remain yourself. Do cool things cause you want to, be real. Creativity with money. Nice. So this is the face of money for me, the energy I ask to take walks with me, to sit with me when I have to negotiate a piece of financial intricacy, be with me when I’m nervous and whelmd. Steve.

I have this taped up on a mirror in my living space, so I can chat and get reassurance that I’m going to make it through all this intense learning. Thanks again Mr. Jobs. I still need you. xo, Rowan ps If anyone has a left over Justin Beiber popup they bought for a halloween joke from Arne’s I’ll take it off your hands,  I wanna collage all over it and have a LIFE SIZE Steve collage. Yes, I will be the most awesome kid in school then, fist pump!