Scars can really shift your health, from decreased range of motion of a limb to constricting bowel function, they are large and in charge. The good news is that they are uncomplicated to heal, especially with a little guidance and perseverance.
First let’s figure out if you even like me. Watch the intro video, and see if I feel like a fit.
- Learn how scars form (in layman’s terms) and why they are a hazard
- Assess! Form a baseline of your body’s terrain. This is an important first step, especially for all my C-Section mamas out there.
- Next I will get you introduced to powerful tools of healing that you may already own
- Practical application, learn the process of applying these tools to get your heal on.
Videos are the primary teaching medium, with an occasional handout. Discussions and questions are invited.
This course is for people who are interested in self healing, scar reduction, and making a difference in how their bodies function.
Table of Contents
First Things FirstHow about a little quiz to test your scar knowledge?
Why I’m the Woman to Teach Youwhat’s that again?
How Your Life Will Be Better after this Course.You can expect more range of motion, less tension, and more EASE.
What the Big Deal Anyway?
What Kinda Scars We Talking About?Scar clarifier, ’cause not all scars are created equal.
Why This Shiz Matters.References and Citations
How the Healing Happens
Document Your ProgressPictures of yo selfie.
How Scars Form, The Unscientific ExplanationI’m not a doctor, or a scientist, or an engineer, so this is pretty right brain over here.
Easy as a Child’s ToySeriously, like would I joke ya?
Healing Protocol: How the Healing Journey Plays Out
Start Where You AreIt’s ok that you didn’t start twenty days, weeks, or years ago. We are here now.
Setting Up a Sacred Healing SpaceSetting the tone for healing
Just Touch It.Warm up those mitts, it’s touching time in Texas (or wherever you are)
Healing Tools; The 411Less than 50 bucks, and you may already have most of these in your home.
Castor Oil, Who is it NOT for?I 100% need you to read this.
Putting the Process TogetherIt’s not hard, seriously.
Laparoscopic Surgeries, ex Weightloss and Ports
C Sections & Surgical BirthsYour Birth Matters.
Trans* Chest Surgery
Ostomies, now what?
Scars from Burns, with a Side Convo about Chronic Pain
Let’s Talk Breasts!
Heart and Chest Surgery
Cancer, and Scars from Treatments
Birth Trauma and Perineal tears
I Believe in You, You are Your Own Best Healer.A pep talk.
When is it Time to Stop?How to know when the party’s over.
Let’s Stay Together, Shall We?Awe now, we aren’t breaking up, are we?!!!!
Value of Community in Healing ChallengesBirds of a feather….
Thank YouLove, gratitude and a request.
Texas Massage CEU
How to get a 3 hour Texas Massage CEUin three easy steps!
Massage CEU QuizReady Set GO!
Im not kidding when i said your course has changed my world. 27 years i didn’t touch my surgical birth scar, 27 years. like wow. and today i feel like i am connected to my soul again. Your course is magic, I’m telling you it changes lives, it should be out there –
Can’t wait for my surgeon to see it at my next appt. I really can’t wait to share with others. I just gave a friend your info yesterday. I didn’t do it on my own. I followed your teaching and had faith, but NEVER did I expect such a fabulous result!!
As a Doula and a Massage therapist I am always looking for new tools and techniques to offer my clients. When I learned that Rowan was offering this course I jumped at the opportunity to learn. The simple,affordable, tangible way she offers clients to take the power of healing into their own hands is phenomenal. Shes is knowledgable, relatable and entertaining. Thanks for sharing your magic Rowan.
You aren’t incapable.
…or even deformed
You’re just scarred – with a scarred dick to match.
Whether you’re saying hello to a pretty lady, spending time with your guys, networking on the job, the secret to self confidence?
Dude, it’s your dick.
Sure, you’ve managed to get your mingle on.
You’ve had (mostly) successful romantic encounters.
And maybe even knocked it out of the park a time or two.
But there’s one little problem:
You’ve got insecurity riding around in your pants cause
Your power wand isn’t confident.
Confidence you’ve worked seriously hard to attain.
Confidence that doesn’t just define your dating life,
But who you are.
And while being scarred up isn’t the worst thing ever,
It doesn’t reflect you,
The man that you are.
Introducing frankenpenis to fucking awesome: A self care online DIY course for dudes who have scars on one of their most prized possessions. Scars that resulted from a sports (or cup injury) or climbing trees as a kid, combat, sexual unhealing, motorcycle or car accident or even circumcision, these can be massively reduced.
This doesn’t make your peen just look better, it performs better. And that makes you FEEL (as in receive sensation) better. You feel me now?
This is about your confidence.
Confidence that you can deliver, confidence that you can exceed past performances, confidence that when it’s go time, you have what it takes to bring the party.
Isn’t your snazzy car (you’re compensating.) Isn’t an overpowering attitude. Isn’t money, fame, fortune.
It’s in your pants.
This is where I can help.
I wrote a course about healing scars after years and years of helping folks recover from surgery, and one day a light bulb when off. What happens when a man who had been embarrassed about a dick that doesn’t perform well gets the simple as fuck training to heal his own scars?
So if you:
- hook to the left
- hook to the right,
- have a tight hood that restricts your blood flow
- scars that cause tears with friction,
- a penis that needs days to recover from sex,
- a scar bridge,
- a tight band mid shaft that constricts,
- urethral stricture,
- a dribble thats hard to control,
- have lost part of your dick to combat or trauma,
- have ever said the words “I have a franken penis”
this course is for you.
Look, I don’t know you, I don’t know what’s south of the belt, but I know when I’m in the presence of a confidant dude. I can FEEL it. And I bet I’m not the only one.
I want for you:
- No wet spots on the front of your pants
- No more standing at an odd angle to pee so you don’t miss,
- Decreased sexual injuries (with those awful and painful healing times)
- No hesitation initiating romance
- A strong erection that doesn’t take a pill
- Or even worse stop being a complete arrogant prick because you feel inadequate.
Nodding your head? How about some:
- Peen pride
- A body you feel comfortable with
- Self Esteem
- A quiet sense of self that silently brags of assurance for days.
That’s what living comfortably with yourself looks like.
Bottom Line: I’ll teach you how to heal your scars with some low tech supplies and techniques that anybody can master. And then you can get on with your bad ass epically cool life.
Wait, you don’t have one yet?
Dude, It’s your Dick.
Table of Contents
- How YOU Can Make It Better
This is a DIY course.
- Why You Might Have Scars
The short answer is usually Trauma. Next answer is infection.
- What That Would Look Like*
Dick pics, can you relate?
- What That Would Feel (Or NOT Feel) Like
Decreased sensitivity, pain, and possibly difficulty maintaining an erection.
- Document Your Progress
Stop right now and take a dic pic. I’m for serious.
- Tools You Need/ Supply list
You probably have most of this stuff at home. Seriously.
- Skills You Need
Massage, heat, oils, dry brushing, enthusiasm!
- Putting It All Together
Skills + Supplies + Action = Glorious Peen Healing
- How Long Will This Take
You’ve heard that story about Rome, yes?
- News You Can Use
Resources and info for going forward.
- Let’s Stay Together.
Got some questions for me? Need support from a community? Great. I’ve got a plan.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is this for serious?
What kinds of “conditions” can be improved by therapy?
Any condition that is a result from scarring, either internal or externally. And what I’m learning here is that many people don’t know if chronic conditions are a result of their scars, or that they even recognize what a scar looks like when it’s on a penis. And because I’m not a doctor and I don’t want to get tagged for practicing medicine without a license, I’m not going to say specific conditions, but I can say that if there are ways that your penis isn’t functioning the way you’d like due to trauma or past infections, as a massage therapist and someone who knows the physiology of the body and ho scars reduce I can absolutely tell you how to help heal.
What can I expect to achieve from therapy?
My primary goal for this DIY course is to reduce pain, improve function, and to put healing tools into YOUR hands so that there is a sense of “I got this” and how about some more insight on how your own body works?
Will my information/enrollment be private?
Short answer: YUP. Longer answer: I’m not adding you to any mailing list, there are spots to comment under the lessons if you want to ask me something and other course attendees might see that, and we have a SECRET group on FaceBook that you can join if you’d like. It’s all up to you to on how you’d like to participate. PS I’m not taking any one on one communication, not soliciting private dic pics cause 1) I don’t need a bunch of dic pics blowing up my phone and 2) there is always somebody who ruins it for everybody. Don’t be “that guy.”
How long will it take to get results?
It pretty much starts with the first session, and by that I mean things start to change. After that its pretty much up to you, your goals, and how you integrate this into a five or ten minute daily self care habit.
Can i expect full restoration of my foreskin?
You know, on that one I don’t know. I’ve curated what I perceive to be all the legit foreskin restoration sites and resources, so on this one we will learn together.
You wanna know why I started to hoop?
To heal a broken heart.
And it did. I did. We did it together.
I invite all folks to come hoop with me – beginner , advanced, and even the I-can’t-keep-it-up newbie.
It’s all going to be fun fun fun.
See all those different shapes of bodies? (That’s me in the black.)
I’d love for you to join me.
Hooping Details right over here……at Punk Rock Hoops
Best place to buy hoops in Houston? Punk Rock Hoops at The Discovery Green Flea By Night!
Tarot People, we are PUMPED!!!!
Fresh back from the readers studio where we met some awesome peeps, learned bunches, and are ready to share and grow our knowledge! SO if you wanna come to class early and practice your layouts and spreads, we have new goodies to play with!
The PLAN: We are going to study one card at a time!
First up is some intuition development, seeing what the card says to us personally with colors, folks on the card. the way their bodies are positioned etc, and then we will talk about what the traditional meanings are for the Rider Waite deck.
From there we will shred up some magazines for a collage fest as we create our own card with our own personal meanings and significance. Its also cool to cheat and put a few words on in or on the back of your card before we laminate that baby.
Bring your favorite deck or two, and for sure no experience necessary cause mostly we are wanting to have fun, hang with like minded people and get to know ourselves a little bit better through art.
Class is $13
It’s on Saturday nights from 5-7pm.
Interested, shoot me an email…this event is invite only. (cool huh!?!)
ps we are using Tarot Wisdom by Rachel Pollack if you wanna get that Formal
7007 North Fwy #435
Houston TX 77076
*Located inside the
North Houston Birth Center
w/Preggers Can Be Choosers